In many ways  I have just begun my journey toward Him. I want to move toward greater intimacy by becoming more holy as He is perfectly Holy.

Today it started with Revelation and the church of Ephesus.

Rev 2:4-5 (KJ2000) “4 Nevertheless I have somewhat against you, because you have left your first love.5 Remember therefore from where you are fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto you quickly, and will remove your lampstand out of its place, except you repent.”

3 things this passage points out are:
Remember from where you are fallen,
and Return (Do the first works).

Rev 3:19-20 (KJ2000) “19 As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous therefore, and repent.20 Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hears my voice, and opens the door, I will come in to him, and will eat with him, and he with me.”

‘I love you Jesus.
Above all.
Take away my deception and renew a fresh perspective for me.’

I find that idols I harbor sometimes are time, talent and treasure. I want to turn them over to Jesus,
‘Jesus take my time – I always have enough with you because you contain eternity.
I sometimes think I have no talent but I always have enough because you make all things work for my good.
Take my treasure and exchange it for real treasure that is from above. You own everything.’

Jesus is good and beautiful. My ego wants to resist His way sometimes because I think I know better. I lack trust to get through the storms and know He is in it and through it and on the other side.

He is walking with me throught the storm. He has come out in it and is walking on the waves toward me. ‘I join you Jesus.’
What are the first works? What does it mean to be zealous?

How can I repent better?

Luke 17:6-10 (KJ2000) “6 And the Lord said, If you had faith as a grain of mustard seed, you could say unto this sycamine tree, Be plucked up by the root, and be planted in the sea; and it would obey you.7 But which of you, having a servant plowing or feeding cattle, will say unto him by and by, when he is come from the field, Go and sit down to eat?8 And will not rather say unto him, Make ready that I may eat, and gird yourself, and serve me, till I have eaten and drunken; and afterward you shall eat and drink?9 Does he thank that servant because he did the things that were commanded him? I think not.10 So likewise you, when you shall have done all those things which are commanded you, say, We are unprofitable servants: we have done that which was our duty to do.”

God does not thank us.

Reading the Bible. Lately I’ve had this idea that I do not read the bible correctly because I would change if I was reading it right. This is true. God empowers me to change. But it is also a lie because the purpose is for me to agree that I can’t read the Bible correctly. I can with His help.

The Bible is like a bedroom or a garden. It is a good place to meet Jesus.
‘Help me, Jesus, to be careful of my hidden and disguised idols. Expose them and expose me. I want to love you with all my heart and mind and spirit and strength.’

Deut 6:5 (KJ2000) 5 And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your might.
My heart means with all my most interior organ, with all my life and with all my zeal.
‘ I love you Jesus.’
Help my eye be single. Anything other than you can be a distraction or idol.

Matt 6:19-22 (KJ2000) “19 Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust does corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal:20 But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust does corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.22 The light of the body is the eye: if therefore your eye be sound, your whole body shall be full of light.”

A sound eye is single, clear and healthy
“I want all of you. Don’t hold anything back.” -thought from God.

‘Thank you Jesus.’

‘Perfect love casts out fear. Don’t try to define rules to follow like concrete. Keep your eyes on me and I will show you what to do.’ – thought from God.

1John 4:4-6 (KJ2000) “4 You are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.5 They are of the world: therefore they speak of the world, and the world hears them.6 We are of God: he that knows God hears us; he that is not of God hears not us. By this we know the spirit of truth, and the spirit of error.”
1John 4:7-11 (KJ2000) “7 Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and everyone that loves is born of God, and knows God.8 He that loves not knows not God; for God is love.9 In this was manifested the love of God toward us, because God sent his only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through him.10 In this is love, not that we loved God, but that he loved us, and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another.”

To love Jesus is ‘worse’ than I think. I must die completely.
Thank you, Jesus for introducing me to this servant life you have designed for me.
It is the greatest satisfaction I have ever experienced. I want more of you and less of me.

1John 4:18-21 (KJ2000) “18 There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear: because fear has to do with punishment. He that fears is not made perfect in love.19 We love him, because he first loved us.20 If a man says, I love God, and hates his brother, he is a liar: for he that loves not his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen?21 And this commandment have we from him, That he who loves God love his brother also.”

I was afraid of what people can make me do. I was misled. I blamed them for the bad decisions I made. No more. It is my own fault and my fault alone.
‘Please forgive me Jesus my LORD.
Thank you for your word. It is not like reading the newspaper or even a very difficult textbook.
It is life. It is your will being done.
Praise you. You are good beyond my understanding and Your Word accomplishes what you set it out to do. When you set it out to make stars it made stars. When you set it out to change hearts it changes hearts. Praise you Jesus Praise you.’

Gen 1:3 (KJ2000) “3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.”

If I am afraid of God having control over my heart, think about how much He actually does control my inner organs. I do not tell my lungs to keep functioning and my heart to keep beating.
I am only ‘aligning’ myself to the truth. God keeps my heart beating every beat. It is a lie that I don’t need Him to keep living.

* Ezek 36:8-9 (KJ2000)
“8 But you, O mountains of Israel, you shall shoot forth your branches, and yield your fruit to my people of Israel; for they are soon to come.9 For, behold, I am for you, and I will turn unto you, and you shall be tilled and sown:”

Ezek 36:25-38 (KJ2000) “25 Then will I sprinkle clean water upon you, and you shall be clean: from all your filthiness, and from all your idols, will I cleanse you.26 A new heart also will I give you, and a new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you a heart of flesh.27 And I will put my spirit within you, and cause you to walk in my statutes, and you shall keep my judgments, and do them.28 And you shall dwell in the land that I gave to your fathers; and you shall be my people, and I will be your God.29 I will also save you from all your uncleannesses: and I will call for the grain, and will increase it, and lay no famine upon you.30 And I will multiply the fruit of the tree, and the increase of the field, that you shall receive no more reproach of famine among the nations.31 Then shall you remember your own evil ways, and your doings that were not good, and shall loathe yourselves in your own sight for your iniquities and for your abominations.32 Not for your sakes do I this, says the Lord GOD, be it known unto you: be ashamed and confounded for your own ways, O house of Israel.33 Thus says the Lord GOD; In the day that I shall have cleansed you from all your iniquities I will also cause you to dwell in the cities, and the ruins shall be rebuilt.34 And the desolate land shall be tilled, instead of lying desolate in the sight of all that passed by.35 And they shall say, This land that was desolate has become like the garden of Eden; and the waste and desolate and ruined cities have become fortified, and are inhabited.36 Then the nations that are left round about you shall know that I the LORD rebuild the ruined places, and replant that which was desolate: I the LORD have spoken it, and I will do it.37 Thus says the Lord GOD; I will yet for this be inquired of by the house of Israel, to do it for them; I will increase them with men like a flock.38 As the holy flock, as the flock of Jerusalem in her solemn feasts; so shall the waste cities be filled with flocks of men: and they shall know that I am the LORD.”

This is my prayer:
sprinkle clean water upon me, Jesus. Cleanse me from my filthiness and from my idols.
Give me a new heart and a new spirit. Give me a heart of flesh. Cause me to walk in Your statutes. Save me from all my uncleanliness.

v.36 b ‘I the LORD have spoken it, and I will do it.”
Imagine a little bigger. There are republicans in New York City.
What if my church became populated like New York City.
What if a Billy Graham conference occurred in Myrtle, PA where tens of thousands showed up?

Where would they stand? In the yard. Who would feed them? Jesus, Jesus and Jesus.
‘ Ready your hearts. I will take care of the food and the place’ – thought from God.

Matt 14:15-21 (KJ2000) “15 And when it was evening, his disciples came to him, saying, This is a desert place, and the time is now late; send the multitude away, that they may go into the villages, and buy themselves food.16 But Jesus said unto them, They need not depart; you give them to eat.17 And they say unto him, We have here but five loaves, and two fishes.18 He said, Bring them here to me.19 And he commanded the multitude to sit down on the grass, and took the five loaves, and the two fishes, and looking up to heaven, he blessed, and broke, and gave the loaves to his disciples, and the disciples to the multitude.20 And they did all eat, and were filled: and they took up of the fragments that remained twelve baskets full.21 And they that had eaten were about five thousand men, besides women and children.”

‘Don’t be concerned about how to replicate miracles. That is my domain.
Concern yourself about the implications. Come to me. Bring them here to me. You give them to eat.’ – thought from God.
What do we eat of? Jesus Himself. Am I ready to share Jesus? Do I know Him myself.
If I do love is easy. If not it is impossible.

John 6:26-27 (KJ2000) “26 Jesus answered them and said, Verily, verily, I say unto you, You seek me, not because you saw the miracles, but because you did eat of the loaves, and were filled.27 Labor not for the food which perishes, but for that food which endures unto everlasting life, which the Son of man shall give unto you: for on him has God the Father set his seal.”

John 6:35 (KJ2000) “35 And Jesus said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that comes to me shall never hunger; and he that believes on me shall never thirst.”

“It is true that the devil is trying to cause division. The solution is keeping your eye on me.” – thought from God.

It is OK to say negative things. It is the truth that is important.
Jesus says negative things to me all the time. like I need to repent.

I respect Him because He loves me. I am thankful for all He has done and when He tells me I am making mistakes and am wrong I am not quick to lash out. He leads me down the path of wisdom where I can hear correction and be thankful.

Prov 19:20-21 (KJ2000) “20 Hear counsel, and receive instruction, that you may be wise in your latter days.21 There are many plans in a man’s heart; nevertheless the counsel of the LORD, that shall stand.”

Prov 9:7-10 (KJ2000) “7 He that reproves a scoffer gets for himself shame: and he that rebukes a wicked man gets himself injury.8 Reprove not a scoffer, lest he hate you: rebuke a wise man, and he will love you.9 Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser: teach a just man, and he will increase in learning.10 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.”

Don’t give up. Sometimes things take long to develop simply because I am too stubborn or too distracted. I need to learn something. I might need to build a certain character trait. Or to become more like Jesus. My love. Whom I am married to who will return soon very soon.

Prov 11:1 (KJ2000) “1 A false balance is abomination to the LORD: but a just weight is his delight.”

Imagine I give the same credence to what someone else is saying as I do to what I personally believe?

Would I be giving him a fair balance? Would it be fair? – yes it would.
First Jesus. His word is.
Next try being fair to others. Not everyone else is wrong where only I know the truth.
In fact many are influenced incorrectly. But how much more am I incorrect also.
Therefore I need to be fair in my relationships.