How often do I relate to the complainers about the manna?
I am sorry God. You are so good.
If God was angry and He is all powerful wouldn’t He crush us like ants? – yes and yes He would.
He is showing us what true love is everyday. It is small and gentle.
It wins. In each moment and in the long run.
I get disgusted by God’s slowness in answering prayers sometimes. I forget that sometimes He says no. I forget that He knows what I need in my spirit. What I really need and what’s good for me. Picture a child asking to run across a busy street. He pleads and complains. Does his father ever allow him to do it? No never.
My frustration could be His mercy.
I have to tell a story about the sound board at church. I was getting very frustrated because the back up singer kept asking to be turned up louder when they were already getting louder than the main singer. I didn’t know what to do and I wanted it to be right. I thought we needed to buy new sound equipment. I thought the back up singer should take my word that they were loud enough. Suddenly the idea popped in my head. It was from God. Turn up the monitor on the back up singer. It was the perfect solution. I was so thankful for His idea. I would not have thought of it because I don’t know much about the sound system. It was the perfect solution, simple and perfect.
A second story. I was promised at work to be paid for overtime. I got my check today and no overtime pay. A million thoughts occured to me including how I will sue them. Then I thought, ‘wait, I’m getting paid. I should be thankful for getting paid to do something I love that I would do for free.”
I really am thankful that God provides plenty of money. I am not rich but I am rich compared to starving children in Africa.
It is about my perspective. The frustrating thing is that I think this is a lame excuse for God to not give me what I want. Like the child who wants to cross the street I think He is just telling me to look at it differently. Take my mind off of what I want. Or like the manna complainers didn’t they just want a steak? The truth is He knows our reality better than we do. He is not just giving excuses. It really is not safe to run across the street and the manna really is the best thing. Even though it is so weird.
I guess it boils down to humility. I must admit that I don’t know better what I need and that it is OK to not get what I want when it is not what is good for me or what I really need.
This is a hard pill to swallow when I am as spoiled as I am.
Father, forgive me for acting spoiled. You give me so much. You help me everyday. You give me strength and grace upon grace. Thank you.
(John 1:16) For from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace.
Even if I am completely needy or feeling tired, hungry and worn God has already given me everything I need. He gave me life this morning and at my birth. He has sustained me each day. Not only that but He has spoiled me richly with His many blessings including a loving family and time with Him.